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| Sunday, November 16, 2008 |
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ALRIGHT.
i know i haven't posted an entry for agessss.
so yeah, today's november 16th.
haha everything is so weird.
i can't think of what to say. hmm.
but here is a chart of what it's like between me and matty.
yeah, a huge improvement in november.
things are getting much more better right now.
but the waiting and stuff is driving me crazy.
so maybe it'll go down a little bit. not that bad though.
and yes, my hair's brown.
i finally dyed ittt =) here are some picturesss.
LIKE ITTT?
haha i loved it the first week.
but after that, it faded alot =(
it was really dark and pretty. now it's more goldenish and just light brown.
but it's still brown. so it's not bad.
haha. =)
gosh, the winter is coming SOON.
i'm gonna need to buy a lot of moisturizers and hand creams and all that stuff.
i haaate it when my skin gets dry and flaky and just ew. so yeah.
i'm kinda excited for the winter; i mean; i looooove the snoowwww<3
soooo prettyyy.
hmm.
hmm. hmm. hmm.
what's there to say?
welllll, my mom let me use her camera just a little bit.
which is Canon EOS 350D DIGITAL
much similar to the camera i want.
the only difference is that it's 400D, which is weird. haha.
but here's some pictures i took with that camera =)
hmm.
today was kinda bad.
i woke up, feel all shitty and just bad.
cause last night, it was all woozy and all. so yeah.
and today i had to like, clean shit and stuff.
& my mom acted like she hated me;
all because i told her that her hair looked good
and that she looked more polite & appropriate.
guess what.
she took it as that i called her
old & she said i was trying to tell her
that she dressed wrong.
just wow.
& i went through my drawer.
and bumped into this one book.
i thought it was like, some used and old notebook.
but nope. it was all fresh & the first 2 pages of them
were written right after 8th grade, summer of 2007.
like wow.
it was creepy reading about what it was like back then.
haha.
on friday.
in biology, we were watching a movie
called Lorenzo's Oil.
GOSH that movie was sooooooo sad.
it was about a boy with ALD, which is
Adrenoleukodystrophy, or ALD, is a genetically determined neurological disorder that affects 1 in every 17,900 boys worldwide. The presentation of symptoms occurs between the ages of 4 and 10, and affects the brain with demyelination.
Demyelination is the stripping away of the fatty coating that keeps nerve pulses confined and maintains the integrity of nerve signals. This process inhibits the nerves ability to conduct properly, thereby causing neurological deficits, including visual disturbances, auditory discrimination, impaired coordination, dementia, and seizures. Demyelination is an inflammatory response and nerve cells throughout the brain are destroyed.
Boys develop normally until the onset of symptoms occurs. Symptoms typically rival those of attention deficit disorder before serious neurological involvement becomes apparent. The symptoms progress rapidly and lead to vegetative state within two years, and death anytime thereafter.
(i know, too much wording and stuff but read these, pleaseee.)
in my own words,
it's a diease that a boy develops at an early age.
and refers to the high saturated fatty stuff in his brain and stuff.
so yeah.
basically, in the movie.
the poor boy looked bad -
he was bald, he had old and spacey teeth
& he could barely walk or talk.
poor thinggg. =(
the movie's based on a true story.
ooh pictures!
here's one from the movie.
(that's lorenzo and his parents).
there's not a lot of pictures =(
but you should watch the movie. it's a good one.
soooo.
i think that'll be it for nowww. haha.
i'm considering of stopping this diary.
i'm just bored with it and i barely have time anymore.
oh well.
peaceee =) |
posted by katiee; @ 1:33 PM  |
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| Sunday, October 19, 2008 |
| ooh ee laa yaa |
sooo today's sunday.
and surprisngly i have no homework. gosh, finally.
but i'll tell you about my week :P
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w e d n e s d a y.
1. i did my PSATs, like i said. yip yeep.
2. i went to like, some kinda meeting.
and left about 10 minutes early from school =)
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t h u r s d a y
1. yep yep the gym thing. gosh that was funnn.
but it's getting colder and colder each day though =(
i can't wait for the winter though !
___________________________________________________
f r i d a y
1. i was supposed to go to maria's after school
but guess what. the bitch didn't let me go =(
2. i also got picked up early that day. around 3 hours early. =)
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s a t u r d a y
1. when i woke up, i was greeted with my sister cleaning around the room. (i sleep on the top of the bunk bed so like i saw the floor much cleaner and stuff.)
thank god she finally cleaned. she's such a slob.
2. i then went downstairs & went into a cleaning fit. cleaned the windows, the doors windows, the mirrors and the table. and the rest of the day; i was just bored. nothing to do. thanks mom.
3. and then later that night; my pops is the biggest asshole ever.
he came in, told me to get off the laptop at like 11 something. my cellphone charger wire was still in the socket & he got mad and took it away from me.
he thinks that if i leave the charger in, it'll make a fire.
so now i don't have my charger & my cellphone is dead. thanks.
___________________________________________________
s u n d a y
1. eh still okay. didn't do much.
i really hate mom. all this inactiveness for nothing. i could've been out - eating, working out a little, doing some photography with her camera and all the other ideas that popped up in my mind. she's a cruel bitch.
blah. so i think that's it for now.
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OH RIGHTTTT.
i've been wanting to share this with you.
i've started to get obsessed with DeviantArt.
& i have an account there. it's Beloved-Aquamarine
haha don't ask about the name. but i like the word aquamarine though !
so i've been putting a lot of photography into my favorites.
check it out ?
click hereeee !
and if you wanna see my gallery which is laaaaaaaaame.
click hereee !
but once i get the camera i want. i'll start uploading tons of pictures
similar to what is in my favorites :3
i know i never mentioned about the camera !
but i'm hoping to get thisss-
the name is PowerShot S5 IS Digital Camera.
in the brand name of Canon :P
BUUUUUT
if i want this kind of pictures
click here to seee !
i would need to get this camera-
the name is Canon EOS 400D DIGITAL.
i'm having a hard time deciding which camera =(
the budget is under $1,000. mom's willing to get me a camera
with a price of up to $1,000. soooo. yeah.
help me pick which one.
or RECOMMEND me a good quality camera !
thanks.
oh and i still think elvis presley = ♥.
peaceee.
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| posted by katiee; @ 9:03 AM |
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| Thursday, October 16, 2008 |
| i don't know. |
right now, i'm doing my homework.
but it sucks. 30 more word maps to go (it has to have a denotation, connonation, antonym, synonym and a sentence about the word)
& i have 30 done already. yeah, 60 words.
but anyways.
i'm starting to hate mom even more.
why?
she's not letting me see maria anymore.
& she's not letting me participate in the mummers parade.
which is just really ridiculous.
& her reasons were:
- maria's family uses her to sell candy for money for the Mummers.
- maria's family put some ideas into my mind & made me want to get brown hair.
- maria's evil to me and treats me like shit.
that's the main reasons.
there are way more things that mom said about her and her family.
which is really negative & offending.
so yeah i just really hate her.
another topic.
yesterday i took the PSATS.
which is like a practice test before the real SATS.
the math part was easy.
but the writing part. oh boooy.
i think i did ok. i don't care though.
today my bestfraan kate got me gummy worms.
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU ♥
haha alright.
that's my love for her :3
that's what happens when someone gets me gummy candy <3
karena kind of canceled plans with me.
we don't know for sure yet. but it's probably not gonna happen anyways.
and maria. well you know my mom, she doesn't let me see her.
so i have no plans for HALLOWEEN. =(
this sucks.
haha today at P.E.
i like, climbed onto the top of these monkey bars twice.
at the franklin square we went to.
my arms are a little sore but it was pretty fun :P
oh my cellphone.
it sucks soo much.
today the jump button like, got ripped off by the screen.
& now it's loose and easy to fall off.
everything about my cell is so crappy.
when the button thing was off; i couldn't type anything.
it just like, did nothing.
and once i put the button back on.
it's working fine.
dumb cellphone.
i've been bothering mom to get me a new cellphone =(
this thing is like, almost 2 years old.
i'm not trying to make it so that i get a new cellphone every 1, 2 years
but come on. this thing is all beat up & broken & missing pieces.
and the screen has like, a crack in it too.
i want the SIDEKICK LX.
in brown. yeh. i'll just wait for mom to get it.
blah.
okay well my school's starting to do the NHD thing.
i think i wanna do Elvis Presley for my project =)
because he's hot & awesome. seriously.
gosh, he's so handsome =)
hahaha. i love himmm :P.
i think that'll wrap up everything.
peaceee. =) |
| posted by katiee; @ 4:51 PM |
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| Wednesday, October 8, 2008 |
| oh ee laa |
haha idk.
today's wednesday. 8th.
yesterday was my dadday's birthdayy :]
happy birthday <3
for the past week, it've been okay i guess.
the school's just the same as usual.
last week i managed to give my friend a puppy she've always wanted.
(she have been waiting since JUNE)
well,
i have a big family of dogs and birds.
so we have puppies every now and then.
& we just gave out all the puppies to people.
and yeah, for free =P we're not greedy !
soooo. yeah thank god.
i'm happy for her :] my only concern is for the puppy to stay healthy :/
she was recently sick sooo.
but good lucks too her :]
what else?
yesterdaaaay my sister shadowed me at my school.
she's like, in 8th grade & applying for high schools.
so. she wanted to like, visit and all.
and after she shadowed,
i had my sign language club after school.
and she went there too.
there were about 13 people.
it was actually interesting & fun !
the club is basically all about teaching sign language.
it's no big deal to me :P
i have no school tomorrow ! gosh !
too much no-school days. :/
oh well, it's good though.
because the english class's been getting on my nerve !
too much homework + the tests, gosh.
the only thing i have problem with is the homework.
1. it's too much & takes up maybe 3 hours.
2. since i'm only in 10th grade and it's 11th grade stuff, it's alot.
the only thing that's good about the homework
is it helps me remember the words and other stuff we learned.
so that's okay i guess.
but god.
haha.
hmm.
the hair thing. i guess mom's not going to do it. =(
i haaaate my hair. i hate the blonde color.
! ! ! ! !
she's evil =(
oh well. maybe i can try & sneak.
but of course she can like, ground me or something.
and change my hair and shit.
oh well.
my plans for the weekend.
go to maria's. videotape her getting the braces off ! go home.
yeh simple as that.
ooh ! ooh ! ooh !
let's not forget the
HALLLLOWEEEEN<3
i have some options.
1. dress up as the tom raider (me and karena are doing celebrities)
2. go to the eastern state penitentiary, with karena or maria.
3. go to the fright factory, with karena or maria.
we'll see what happens (:
i loooove halloween; i love going out & get the candyyy.
and go to the haunted places ! <3
well this is a mega looong blog !
peaaaceee, diaryy <3 |
| posted by katiee; @ 7:25 PM |
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| Saturday, October 4, 2008 |
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well, it's octoberr.
& today could've been me and matty's 1 month anniversary after one year of being together. guess that sucks alot =[
so it's 11:56.
i just ate leftover pizza from last night dinner.
yummm.
today's going okay.
mom was at the bank for like a while.
but she just got back so that's good.
i'm supposed to dye my hair today.
well, we'll see what happens.
my mom. she has a twisted mind =P
anyways, wanna see what hair color i'd want to dye my hairr to?!
something like that shade. maybe lighter or something - idk !
& omgomgomgomg.
i was totally in heaven.
EGG ROLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSS!
mom bought like, TEN of them. (:
she ate two, my sista ate four & i had 4 egg rolls to myself.
gosh, my stomach is all full and happy <3
today is definitely a good day =)
it's funny how it's like a crazy cycle where things are really good for me
(for example. i found $60 in the bathroom when i was with kate before school)
then i get a nasty cold & go through crazy shit.
now it's becoming much better now.
lmao it's crazy.
well i think that's it (:
peaceeee. |
| posted by katiee; @ 8:55 AM |
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| Sunday, September 28, 2008 |
| =( |
i honestly have no idea.
i'm in a crappy mood. i'll tell you why.
okay so. i'll start with jesusboy.
his name's matt though but i prefer to call him that.
and yeah, it's insulting.
so anyways.
what happened was we became friends again - after over a year of hating and stuff.
but this gave him the access to get EVEN more closer to me.
so basically he took advantage of me over the summer and etc.
& broke his word. because he didn't stop after matty (the one i love) told him not to be all over me and etc.
so in the end i ended it all & started to haaaaate him after that.
ugh i wish i never gave him another chance. when he walked out of my life in the first place. so yeah, i just reallllllly hate him.
because one- he took advantage of me.
and two- because he messed up everything between me & matty.
so now matty's probably never gonna be back with me.
today was just a bad day =(
ugh ever since i realized he took advantage of me and shit;
i just have been sick to my stomach.
the reason i'm telling you about this is because
after i stopped talking to him in the summer, i started to talk to him again
like a week ago or less.
not to be friends again, but to spew my hate on him & try to tell him he's wrong.
and argue about the bible.
okay imma stop.
but yeah.
and matty.
ugh he just upsets me.
& i can't help it but hold onto the feelings.
i've been trying to show him that i'm serious and that i'm willing to make it all better.
but i understand why he's not going to jump into a relationship again with me.
because the whole relationship, i pretty much fucked it all up.
with my cutting & depression.
yeah, the hoodies were for hiding that.
with the crushes, with the guys and stuff.
so he doesn't trust me.
because he thinks i'm going to hurt him all over again.
but really.
the reason i wasn't ready in the first place.
was because i didn't think it'd end up as a long term relationship.
& i've never had someone that truely loved me and cared about me so much.
so i basically didn't take it all so seriously.
but now i regret it sooooo much.
& another reason is all the bad relationships in the past has influenced me.
to cheat on him, to fall for other people, to lie and do shit.
because that's what have happened to me.
& i know i truely love matty.
because everytime he says something that'll never happen.
like for example, us not getting together again.
i break down & cry for a long time.
and the truth is.
i've NEVER cried so much over anyone before.
and i've never felt sooooooo hurt.
so heart-broken. all torn. just really messed up.
i honestly didn't think i'd get hurt like that.
& i'm going to make sure i'll never love a guy again.
not after matty.
& i really hate this
but i just keep wishing and waiting for him to say i love you.
just for once.
i'd give everything for that.
because it means the world to me.
i'm just scared to tell him that
because i really don't want to feel like an idiot
or end up getting rejected.
it really kills alot.
& i don't even want to give up and move on.
i just want to prove to him that i'm not the same
& that i'll be the girl he deserves.
ugh.
i gotta calm down & stop.
but yeah. that's basically what have been bothering me.
peace & love. |
| posted by katiee; @ 3:59 PM |
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